Is she neglecting me? Is he interested in his female colleague? These are common questions that circulate in the minds of many people. But if you suffer from insecurity post marriage, it is very important that you overcome it. Marriage itself is a tough deal to handle. So, to be honest, if you feel insecure in this relationship you might encourage many imaginative notions. This is detrimental for your bonding and the result is needless to say. Therefore, identify if you are the suffering from any insecurity that can create havoc in your married life. We have compiled a few insecurities people suffer from post marriage with their solutions. Take a look and save your marriage.
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1. Smelling the presence of a third person
The most common suspicion that hits a couple after marriage is when one of the partners start believing that there is a third person in between them. The suspecting spouse starts assuming that every act that his/her spouse performs is to be put behind a big question. Trivial issues such as being frequently late in returning home, being too tied up in office work, etc. take up mammoth shape. They act as spice that ignites this flame of suspicion further.
How to overcome it
Extramarital affair is not a very uncommon proposition, but it doesn't means that every individual is keen on having an affair post marriage. So, clear your mind off these notions. In case if you feel, you can always talk to your spouse to get out of this insecurity.
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2. Suspecting love has lessened
Married couples often complain that their spouses do not love them the way they used to do during the time of their affair or the initial days of their nuptial. They suffer from lovelessness and plunge into the world of depression.
How to overcome it
Love takes a different course post marriage. It never remains sheer passion anymore. Now, things like responsibility and duties get added to love. This changes its dimension. But love never gets lessened. So, get out of this notion that you are not loved. He/she still loves you in the same way.
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3. Thinking that your spouse is not happy with you
If you think that your spouse is not happy with you, it can be just your insecurity. You might feel that you are not being able to make him/her happy. You may also assume that you are inferior to him/her and your spouse deserved a better match.
How to overcome it
This is nothing but inferiority complex in you that is making you insecure. If your husband/wife has never complained that he/she is unhappy, there is hardly any reason to believe that you are a mismatch. So, get out of this false assumption.
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4. Your spouse is spending time elsewhere
Some people complain that their spouse spends less time with them. They suffer from insecurity that their husband’s/wife’s time spare time is being utilized by someone else or something other. This makes them irritated and frustrated.
How to overcome it
If your spouse is not spending time with you off late it never means that he/she is devoting the spare time for causes other than you. He/she might be too caught up in work and seriously running short of time. So, instead of assuming and brooding, talk to him/her. Know what is making him/her tied up these days.
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5. Contemplating if the relationship will survive or not
There are a few couples who keep on pondering whether their marriages will be happy ever after or they will also split up like their next door neighbor! This creates unnecessary tensions in marriages making the life of both the husband and wife a hell.
How to overcome it
Marriage is a gamble. There is hardly any scope of assuming anything. Nobody can guarantee how long will it survive. So, contemplating on this and making life a mess is dumbness. Get over it and enjoy your today to the hilt.
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6. Insecurity about your financial conditions
Financial insecurity is most dominant among couples where either of the one is a bread earner. The non earning partner keeps on pondering what will happen if his/her spouse looses job. This makes life utterly frustrating.
How to overcome it
Although financial matters are really serious issues, you cannot die thinking of tomorrow. Instead, it is much wiser to sit with your spouse and discuss the matter logically. Think of a way by which you can support him/her financially too to make your future secured.
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7. Thinking you are not a good bed partner
Sex is the ultimate key to a successful marriage. Keeping this fundamental in mind some people suffer from intense frustration, thinking that they are not being able to satisfy their spouses in bed.
How to overcome it
You will never have to assume much as a sex starved spouse will indicate that from his/her acts and behaviors. Therefore, feeling down and underestimating your conjugal abilities without any solid basis is foolishness. Get out of it and look at life in a straight way.
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8. Assuming that your spouse is a spendthrift and you will be bankrupt
A spouse who spends more lavishly can become a threat for his/her partner. The complaining partner can suffer from insecurity that the spendthrift partner is draining out their hard earned savings. This will surely make them pauper one day!
How to overcome it
If you really think that your spouse is wasting money, talk to him/her directly on this rather than suffering from insecurity. Plan out a scheme where he/she will be forced to deposit money every month besides the family expenditures. Things will change for good and your insecurity will also vanish.
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9. Assuming that spouse is getting indulgence
You might feel that all the dissatisfaction and discontent your spouse shows is because he/she is getting indulgence from somewhere. You raise your fingers towards his/her family members and close ones thinking that he/she will dissolve the marriage one day due to their negative indulgence.
How to overcome it
The discontent in your spouse might have a serious cause behind which you have always overlooked. Try to find that before pointing your finger towards his/her kith and keens. Moreover, if your bonding is strong, indulgences do not matter at all, if there Edit
10. Thinking you might suffer from STDs as he/she might be polygamous
Though a rare proposition, but sometimes husbands/wives feel scared to enter into sexual intimacy with their husbands. They think that their spouses might be STD carriers and might make them diseased in the process. This is more prevalent in couples where one of the partners goes for frequent tours or remains out of station for most part of the year.
How to overcome it
This insecurity is quite justified. But living with it is illogical. So, get your husband/wife tested for STDs to get convinced. Never let him/her guess that you are suspecting his/her integrity. But, pose as if it is a part of general health checkup.
